Grateful

I have so very much to be thankful for.  So even though I'm not sleeping, not fitting into the size jeans I'd hoped to by now, and not any better at planning our family meals than I'd expected to be at this point in marriage... I'm feeling the blessed exhaustion that only comes from motherhood.

My little man woke up all night last night, refusing to surrender for more than an hour or two's sleep at most, and I got up with him each time.  It was not heroically motivated.  It was not a supreme act of sacrifice.  It was, quite simply, my job.  I've had lots of jobs in my life.  LOTS.  Probably twice as many as the average 28 year old.  I've done everything from running a small non profit organization to slinging pancakes at Denny's to dressing up in a gigantic red bird suit and terrorizing young children.  Oh, and I worked at a coffee shop for about a month when I was 15, and it was neither as glamorous or as gratifying as a java fiend might hope...

All this to say, this is just another job, this motherhood gig.  It's "just a job" ... and so much more than that, all at once.  It's filled with moments of drudgery and angst and frustration and clock-watching, punctuated by days where the weekend looms like a far-off fairytale, sustaining hope where hope has all but left the building.  And then there are the other moments.  The ones that catch your breath as you look down at your child, sleeping in your arms, breathing softly through tiny, parted lips ... cheeks as soft as duck down and rosy with new life, and you cannot fathom that this is what you "do" for a living.  Raising humans is frequently thankless, often exhausting, but always miraculous.  The tiny people we're entrusted with literally depend upon us for their survival, let alone their successful and eventual entrance into society.  And when I read stories like this one, it stops me dead in my tracks, breath catching painfully in my throat as I realize that there are parents who would give anything for the privilege of being up at night with a fussy, healthy child.

And then I pour another cup of coffee.  Brewed to perfection by my handsome husband before he left my "office" for his this morning.  Life. Is. Good.

7 Quick Takes - As We Wait in Joyful Hope

Hosted by Jen at Conversion Diary 

Reasons to Hope

1. It's been a pretty good year, all things considered.  I thought this was beautiful... and true.  Sure, there's some awful crap going on in the world today, but at the end of the day, we're still profoundly blessed to live as free men and women in the greatest nation on earth, where our freedoms far outpace those of most of our brothers and sisters elsewhere around the globe.

2.  It's nearly the 4th and final Sunday of Advent.  That means we are finally going to put the ornaments on my poor, dying Christmas tree which is now sporting about the same number of needles on its branches as my vacuum is holding in its dump tank (for lack of an official descriptor).  My dear husband and I came to a liturgical compromise of sorts whereby I was permitted to select our (live!) Christmas tree on the first Sunday of Advent, though we've been decorating it in stages.  So last Sunday was garland, the one before that was lights, and we've finally arrived at ornaments, though the aridity of our apartment has all but strangled the life from our poor, mostly-naked evergreen.  (Note: I realize Christmas trees are non-liturgical entities, and my husband is really not the hard ass this makes him out to be.  Our negotiations over Advent/Christmas decor and protocol have actually been nothing short of hilarious...)

3.  My little brother is home from college for the month and he waits tables at a karaoke bar.  They have Journey's entire discography in their system.  My high school babysitte... ahem, sisters are also on Christmas break.  Need I say more?

4.  It snowed last night in Denver!  Granted, it looked like fake fluff from the set of the Full House Christmas special and it melted by 10 am, but it was there!  I saw it!

5.  I have a new job.  A wonderful, incredibly providential and exciting new job, which I'll share more about after the New Year.

6.  My baby sleeps through. the. night.  He is 11 weeks old and he sleeps through the night.  Praise the living God for my dear friends Brigette and Eliz who pointed me toward Babywise while Joseph was still just a twinkle in our eyes.  It hasn't always been easy, but man oh man has it been worth it.

7.  I wake up to this face every morning.

Yeah, I've got hope.  And it has nothing to do with the dude in the White House.

7 Quick Takes On The Idiocy of Our Times

Well okay, there are only 5 today ... because it's almost 5:00 here in good ol' Denver, and I need to get on the road for some seriously enjoyable I-25 Friday-afternoon-commute-mania.  But first, I would like to briefly and bluntly share some stupendously asinine news bits from this week in history.  Enjoy your weekend!

1. Women who are pregnant, or suspect they are pregnant, should not use this product, the FDA said.  Riiiight.  So would sterile virgins be the intended market they're trying to reach here?

2. Marriage is fundamentally unconstitutional.  Read on for this and other brilliant conclusions being handed down from "impartial" benches 'round the nation. 

3. "Wow, you are getting HUGE."  Delivered with utter sincerity and a goofy smile by an unsuspecting male coworker/postal worker/sales clerk/random stranger.  Thank you, men of the world, for saying aloud what I have long been quietly fearing in the silence of my heart.

4. There is one full teaspoon of sugar in every tablespoon of ketchup.  Maybe this isn't as shocking to the rest of you as it was to me, but I feel positively violated.

5. According to a recent study by the NIH (National Institute of Health), the sexual habits of gay, underaged males are being tracked using online journaling technology to... oh wait, who the hell cares?  And why exactly are our tax dollars being spent to fund this ridiculous garbage?

7 Quick Takes Friday

I've finally caved, figuring that an uninspired post is better than the post I write in my head and never finish and/or publish, and joined the other legion of mommybloggers whose actual responsibilities far outpace their alloted 24 hours per standard day.  So, here are my 7 truly random, non-unifying thoughts...

1. I am going to be pregnant forever.  I was pondering this while perusing the Walmart junior's department last night, fingering the fine poly/rayon blends of summer frocks and wondering if a size14 XL designed for a chunky high-schooler would look good drapped over my pregnant belly.  The answer, it turns out, was yes.  And I don't shop at Walmart.  But apparantly my alter-ego, big-bellied-Bertha, couldn't care less about the working conditions of slave children in China.

2. I've been listening to Laura Ingraham on my morning commute, and NPR on the way home.  I'm anticipating a schizophrenic psychotic break any day now...

3. Is there anything more deliciously ironic in the world than the posturing of our president who wants so badly to be taken "seriously," yet simultaneously feels the need to "connect" with his inferiors.  Pathetic, BHO.  Just pathetic.

4. I've recently forayed into the world of crafty DIY bloggers, and I don't ever want to turn back.  In other news, my unborn child may have spraypaint fume-induced brain damage.  My covered apartment balcony is only so ventilated...  Check out All Things Thrifty for a complete and utter thrill. 

5. Despite what I've read about decreased fetal activity as baby gets too big for his britches, so to speak, it feels like I'm hosting a World Cup rematch in my abdomen, and my child is apparently so territorial, that so much as the slight pressure of an errant coffee mug or a gently-resting book can set off a furious string of roundhouse kicks visible to the naked eye. No wonder the guys in my office look at me with such a mix of wild-eyed panic and awe.  At least I think it's awe...

6. The more I read on the lives of the Saints, the more I'm becoming convinced that ours may not necessarily be a "saint-making age," despite the superabundance of evil all around us.  I'm pretty sure St. Catherine of Siena never would have watched the Hills, and probably would have been stunted in her prolific written correspondence by the existence of Netflix Instant Cue.  Are we too busy to be holy?  Too distracted?  I know I sure feel like I am ...

7. I've almost died while driving twice this week.  The first time involved a dropped lipgloss and the back of an SUV.  The second time could only have happened in Colorado, or possibly Wyoming, when a huge ass horse in a partially-enclosed trailer tooka  flying dump on the interstate at 65 mph and... let's just say the gate wasn't quite high enough to contain all of that equine glory.  I made a rather hasty lane change to avoid physical trauma, but the psychological scarring will remain for years.

Because I Can

I'd like to get a few things off my chest.

First: I loathe our president.  Okay, I don't technically "hate" anyone, but darned if I haven't had to confess feelings of rage and malice for everything that man stands for at almost every visit to the box in the past 14 months....

Second: Universal Healthcare?  Reeeeally?  Remind me who's paying for it again?  And could somebody explain to me how $180 a month for a basic plan is simply out of reach for some Americans, while $300 smart phones and $90 monthly data plans are the status quo?  Here's an idea: You may have free healthcare... if, you can prove that you are actually destitute beyond  a reasonable doubt.  (Note: this means you have neither cable, a cell phone, internet access, nor any of the other myriad "necessities" our culture has deemed essential to existence.  Sheesh.)  I mean, come on people, I've been broke as hell before... but there are some things that you shell out for and others that you go without... and the government isn't there to tell you which is which!

Third: A killer whale dragged a woman to a drowning death by the ponytail, and this is apparently "big news."  For 3 days running.  Now, I am as grieved by the loss of human life as any healthy person would be, but it is not exactly front page news, particularly when the hottest buzz surrounding the incident is whether or not the fricking Orcas are being mistreated at Sea World.  Um, yes.  They probably are.  They are probably very unhappy to be living in fish tanks and not out surfing ice shelves and snarfing down seals.  But seriously, how many humans does this whale have to whack in order to qualify as a credible threat to society?  Put the thing back in the ocean and put it out of its misery.

And finally: I am pregnant.  And this is my blog.  Therefore, I can say preeeeeetty much whatever I want, and you can't fault me for it (well, unless it is immoral or objectively untrue).  Also, please recognize that if you submit obscene, misogynistic, or generally twisted comments for moderation... heh, guess what?  They're not going up.  Period.  Sorry to be so harsh, but I'm not submitting myself or my readers to that abuse.  That being said, please know that I am praying for you, even if you totally freak me out.