House Tour + Insta-gratification

It's been a good long while since I posted an old school straight-up mommy blogger style post. And I'm sorry for that!

I'm still trying to find the right balance to keep you, my faithful old friends, satisfied and entertained without traumatizing my new audience at CNA. Because let's be honest, I'm not going to radically alter my voice or content, but some trauma you have to ease into.

The new blog is almost up and running, the design is going to be beautiful, and I can't wait to show it to you. In the meantime, I'm still "here," and so I figured why not post a little fluff to pass the time?

Oh, also, I finally embraced the modern world and joined Instagram yesterday. Welcome to the 90's, Mr. Banks. (And you all were right: it's the most fun of all social media.)

So something that I really, really love (because I'm a creeper?) is seeing other people's homes. I'm a would be decorating junkie and an HGTV addict, so there's nothing more fun to me than seeing somebody else's style/space and being able to envision them more accurately in their natural habitat when I'm reading their words. (If you're trying to decide if you're disturbed or flattered, go with flattered: I want to see your living room.)

Anyway, do you want to see my house? It's been enjoying a little TLC while I KonMari'd the shit out of my wardrobe/kitchen/bookshelves/decor, and I'm much happier with the way it looks now as opposed to 2 weeks ago. Much.

It's still not perfect, you know, because it's a work in progress. But it makes me happy to coax it along; I get a rush of satisfaction from finding a new spot for a tired piece of furniture or a neglected vase. Cheapest of thrills.

So, here you go, a virtual tour of casa del coffee:

First up, the living room/front entry way.

I just bought gorgeous (and cheap!) long white curtains at IKEA and I'm dying to get them up around that bay window. I have aspirations of hanging them high and wide and framing the gorgeousness of all that natural light that floods into the front of our southern facing house. And since we have a blackout shade we can close at night for privacy and light control, I was free to go with my heart and choose impractical ineffective and oh-so-lovely white. 

The oriental rug was a wedding gift and, while beautiful and expensive, is totally not my taste, but it's here and it's lovely and so I work around it and let it do most of the heavy lifting in terms of pattern/color in this room.

Next up, the family room. The blankest of blank canvases right now because I just spent an afternoon "quieting the space" ala Myquillyn and now it's sitting pretty and plain and waiting for the right touches, not just putting up with whatever I happened to have on hand the weekend we moved in. Not that there's anything wrong with going ahead and throwing something up on the walls, but after a year of not quite right, I'm happy to let it sit semi-undone for a bit while I figure it out.

(I should have disclaimed this sooner, but me + my iPhone 4 are do not a professional photographer make, and I'm not really that skilled on the layout end of things, either, in terms of uploading images. So if this looks like the work of an amateur, at least I'm transparent.)

Most of our stuff is thrifted, and here's the big fat caveat with that: it takes multiple visits to multiple thrift stores over multiple weeks and months to arrive at a "finished" product, at least for me it does. So even though I've found some amazing stuff over the past year and a half since we moved in here, it did take lots of time and patience to get there. Not thrifted: the white china platter (wedding gift), the leather couch (our first repatriation purchase upon arrival Stateside, American Furniture Warehouse), and the round framed mirror (Walmart. Shudder.) Everything else: Goodwill/Saver's/Homegoods/mom and dad's hand me downs.

Next: the opposite of a gourmet kitchen. But whatev, it's a decent-ish size and I have a huge pantry, and my husband is really gifted in the charism of doing dinner dishes before bed. So I've got no complaints. Wait, no, I do have one; the heinous "white" linoleum hanging onto the beleaguered floor for dear life. At least it's not carpet?

Heading down the hall we find ourselves in the master bedroom. It's big enough to fit our king sized bed (the luxury!) but not really big enough to fit anything else, and that's fine by me. I keep it as visually uncluttered as possible because I feel 100% less stressed when it's clean and calm.

(How do I get such amazing shots? I'm telling you, it's the 2 year old camera phone and the steady caffeinated hand. #gifted #blessed)

Oh, I forgot, here's a shot of the basement which contains two semi finished guest rooms, an avocado green full bath with some missing ceiling tiles, and a laundry room and play room. 

That stairwell, my friends, is the reason there's zero toy clutter on the main floor. (That and I'm ruthless with the donations. Ruthless.)

Moving on to the nursery wing.

How cool is the boys' dresser? It weighs 200 lbs and our landlords didn't want to bother taking it with, so we inherited it. Legend has it the original owner/saint decopauger is now happily tucked away in a convent somewhere, none the wiser that her lovely original piece now primarily houses Pull Ups and filthy pajama pants.

And my favorite space in the whole house? (Well, at least until this past weekend's decluttering fest); Genevieve's room.

We don't have a dining room because we're not fancy like that. Actually, it's because I opportunistically transformed the space into my gym/home office while nobody was paying attention. I'm sure if we were trying to fit teenaged boys around our kitchen table we might need this space, but for now I'm super super lucky I can use it this way. Nothing fancy, but it's a happy place that lets me get my work done.

And finally, some random shots of the front porch and our front yard, where the children frolic as I survey my kingdom from behind the storm door or the bay window. I'm sure the neighbors can't handle how hands on my parenting is.

Okay one last shot: Evie can stand! If anyone is still hanging on after this endless stream of blurry cellphone pics, you deserve to see something cute.

What about you? Up for showing a little behind the scenes of your home? Maybe you could throw a little something together and drop a link down below? I'm all eyes, because the only thing better than Pinterest is personalized Pinterest, you know?

Snapshots of a SAHM

This week. Oh, this week.

It's Wednesday, which is technically the halfway mark, but dammit, it's Thanksgiving eve and Dave got home from work early and I'm calling the game. Did you hear that, universe? I'M CALLING THE GAME.

So I'm nesting like a mother loving emperor penguin up in here, and every last thing that Target has to offer for under $10 is fair game. Fair game, I say. Get in my cart.

Some background information, before we go any further:

These are my exterior children, in race cars crafted from humidifier boxes. I was proud of myself on the day this occurred. (If you enlarge the picture to better glimpse my huge, pregnant upper arms, I wish you ill.)

 Before we go any further, this is what I look like right now. I feel like this excuses me from a whole host of  societal constraints and cultural norms. Like not photographing your nearly naked children in cardboard boxes and calling it a 'craft.'

Besides, we've been trying to eat well.

Heck, we even took a field trip to the aquarium after breakfast one morning. This fish may or may not be dead on my kitchen counter right now. My sister's fiancé abandoned him here to die before the holiday, so be it upon his head if Fire has passed into eternity.

But where was I? Oh yes, Target.

This, for the record, is what my local Target looked like at 5:45 pm this fine Thanksgiving eve:

That is a tent. With grown ass men camping inside of it, in anticipation of the EIGHT PM OPENING TOMORROW EVENING.

May God have mercy on us all.

Moving on.

Before hitting up Satan's giant red bullseye, I wandered into Home Goods where I snagged this pretty jute rug made in India for the reasonable song of $19.99:

How legit does my office look now? Practically business chic.

Target yielded these little golden beauties, confusingly titled "dimensional wall applications," which look kind of cool but make my husband a little nervous. For $9.99 I probably could have made them myself out of tissue paper, for that is their composite. But. But…I never would have. And thus ended every argument for buying crafty shit made in China and pre-assmebled at some big box store anywhere, ever.

And now, some gratuitous shots of my favorite places and spaces in the house right now:

My uncluttered and simple bathroom counter. Sparkling clean, thanks to the flip side of my nightly makeup cleansing cloth.

Our medicine cabinet, divested of all but the daily necessities. My mind feels cleansed just looking at it.

Relatively freshly manicured toes + this year's jingle jams from Costco + a new, fluffy bathmat that, as far as I know, has never been pooped on by a human being.

I hope that tomorrow finds all your turkeys trotting and all your Thanksgiving dreams coming true. And I hope that none of you are planning on doing a lick of shopping to mark the day. A pox on grey Thursday, and merry feasting to all.

(For whatever it's worth, I don't know what in the hell is up with the formatting of this post but I'm betting on all my shetland ponies that you people don't come here for graphics and/or design. C'est la computer illiteracy.)

7 Thrift Takes

The other night while feeding the kids and early and ambitious dinner of gluten free grilled cheeses and uncooked green beans (I roll high and heavy in the culinary department), Joey looked up from his plate and nonchalantly stated "I'm gonna pop some tags, Mommy." before dropping his eyes back to his food. I guess that makes me an awesome parent? Or a really, really truly negligent mother, because this song is full of f-bombs. Now, in my defense, it was playing on constant repeat in every bar and restaurant in Rome for a good 2 months of this summer, so he heard it plenty without my queing it up on the Youtube, but still.

Poppin' taaaaaags.

What I really want to communicate to you, fine readers, is the deep and abiding love that I (and my innocent young children) have for thrifting. It's truly my competitive sport of choice in this season of my life, and the way my heart rate elevates at the mere sight of a "Goodwill" logo tells me there is at least a minimal amount of cardio benefit to be had.

Various frames, Goodwill via Target, $2-$4

Like any other sport, there are ground rules which are critical to the success and enjoyment of the game. Imma lay a few down for you, because if I've perfected anything over these past 10 months of purging, donating, purchasing, packing, and than hitting 'replay,' it's the art of the thrift.

Pottery Barn espresso cups, $.99, Rainbow plate, $2 via Saver's.

And so, here you have it:

1. Don't go in blind. This is the first and foremost rule of thrifting, and it is one I didn't fully understand until somewhat recently. Saver's is not Target, and the Salvation Army is not laid out by the same people who stock Anthropologie. 19 times out of 20, you are not going to happen upon some treasure ala Antique Roadshow that is beautiful/functional/valuable just because you happened to wander in to a secondhand shop. Oh no, no no. You need to have a vision, a laundry list of needs and wants, and one that is broad enough to leave room for interpretation but not so broad that you end up buying some crap that is probably only 20% marked down from it's original retail value. I call that getting swindled, and so does Joey. So do your research, make a list of what you're looking for, down to color and cost, and don't settle just because you find something that 'might do.' Trust me, once you get it home, it won't.

I went in looking for a couch, I left with a couch. Tan microfiber couch, Goodwill, $40

2. Which brings me to my next tip: if you don't love it, don't buy it. I'm not saying that piece of beat up furniture you're going to refinish has to be swoon worthy at check out time, but if you don't feel that thrill of excitement when you load that puppy into your cart, don't do it. You wouldn't do it at a full price store, so why would you do it when purchasing other people's discarded crap? If anything, be more choosy when you're thrifting; you can afford to be! At the same time, if you are conisdering something...throw it in the cart and drive around with it a while. You can always put it back (and I do this multiple times in a successful trip) but you can never wrest it from bargain grannie's fingers once she has snatched it up.

Espresso wine cabinent, new in box, Target via Goodwill, $30

3. Don't buy a brand you wouldn't gladly pay full price for. I heed this especially when clothes shopping, because it's important to value cut and quality above all else, especially when it has already been loved once by someone else. This may sound vain, but I won't even look at an item of clothing for myself if it doesn't say J Crew, Banana, Gap, White Black, or Ann Taylor. I have maybe strayed from this rule a half dozen times, and I can tell you, I've got a half dozen mistakes in my closet that never see the light of day. Don't spend your money on second hand 'value' brands, because it isn't a value. Not by the time it gets to you.

(For kid's clothing, my go-to's are Gap, Janie and Jack, Crew Cuts, Children's Place, soooooometimes Old Navy if it's in awesome shape, and Stride Right)

Espresso folding bookcase, Pier One via Goodwill, $15. Random gold mirror, $3.

4. Don't be afraid to take your kids. If I had to think about when I was going to get to a store without the boys, I'd do a lot of thinking and very little actual browsing. The awesome thing about a thrift store is that they are without exception interesting and engaging to little people. Most have a book section, some are even set up like a cafe with tables and coffee. And the toy section: it's a train wreck. So, I park my kids happily in the wreck and, keeping them in eye/ear shot, I shop. They play, I browse, and nobody raises an eyebrow. Because again, we're not at Target here. These teammembers are just trying to stay sober and make an honest buck, they aren't going to look twice at your kid digging happily through piles of grimy toys. Nothing a little Clorox can't handle...

Pottery Barn kids kitchen via Saver's, $8. Tea kettle and various kitchen tools, $.50-$2, Goodwill.

5. Use your imagination...but don't stretch it too far. This kind of goes hand in hand with 1 and 2, but don't fancy yourself some kind of avant garde hipster just because you're standing in front of a pile of 'retro' dinner plates and suddenly envisioning your kitchen looking like a loft in the East Village. But, do take risks. You can afford to be a little more interesting than usual, because if it doesn't work, you can usually exchange the offending item for store credit or simply re-donate it. I took a chance on a pillow that wasn't strictly up my alley and needed a little laundering, and now it's one of my favorite details in our living room.

I love you $30 Target chair, and your $2 World Market pillow pal.

6. Shop early and shop often. Do not make the mistake of hitting up Goodwill one Saturday morning every two months and thinking you're 'doing' this thrifting thing. Part of the reason I find some of the crazy deals that I do is because I go often. These days, that looks like once and sometimes twice per week, because we're trying to put an entire house together, and also because I'm gestating a Christmas turkey here and I need to get my nativity affairs in order. I definitely don't always find something, and I am NOT afraid to walk out emptyhanded, because I know that I could come back in 4 days and find something just perfect waiting for me. Timing is everything, and so is persistence. Find one or two or four stores in your area that you regularly see good merchandise at, and then hit them up. Regularly.

The beige wasteland that is our current family room: couch, kid's rocker (PB kids, $8), IKEA table set ($8), and lone wall decor, all thrifted.

7. Don't be afraid to bargain. While a thrift store is not a garage sale, it's also not the mall, and the employees and managers actually do have the ability to mark down your item if you can make a good case for it. If something is damaged, missing an element, or just plain seems overpriced, ask if they will come down in price. The worst thing you can hear is 'no,' and it's not embarrassing in the least. Because hello, it's a thrift shop. People made one teeny stretch of effort further and dropped their castoffs here instead of the dump. So ask away!

Dave calls this my "mirror mirror." Whatev, I love it. Saver's, $5.

The moral of the story is this: if you love fashion, design, or DIY, you need to accquaint yourselves with this way of life, because it is so much fun and it is so possible to do it well. If you're in Denver, I can point you in the direction of a few of the most lucrative hot spots, but then I will have to kill you ;)

Genevieve's nursery, in progress. Nate Berkus for Target curtains, $10 via Goodwill. Anthro pillow, $6 via Goodwill.

(hint, hint: Cherry Creek Goodwill. Super Target dumps their off-season merchandise there every Wednesday morning.)

Now get out there and start thrifting. And be sure to take thyself to Jen's on your way out.

Anthro bookshelf hack

Oh, who am I kidding, probably more closely akin to Target's dorm-room chic RE line...but a girl can dream.

Armed with a roll of hideously expensive Hallmark wrapping paper, a can of Elmer's spray adhesive, and a willing victim in the form of a freshly-stained former bachelor bookshelf, I set out to make DIY history on my back porch during naptime yesterday.

A few lessons learned:

1. Measure things. Oh, you do measure when you make things?

Well you're awesome, and I'm not.

2. Spray adhesive will be sticky once applied to the surface you're looking to adhere stuff to. Along with your forearm hairs, cell phone screen, and unsuspecting lurking jogging stroller. Ahem.

3. Wrapping paper was a brilliant and yet oh so stupid pick for covering the back of my bookshelf. It looks awesome...except from certain angles where it looks like...wrapping paper. So perhaps a matte rather than high gloss finish next time? Does wrapping paper come in a matte finish? Do I have too much time on my hands? Probably, maybe, and definitely.

Without further ado, I present to you, my new 'home office.'

I started with some scissors, the above-mentioned luxury wrapping paper, and some spray glue.

I measured one space between shelves (should have measured each individually), cut 3 more against the template of the first, pressed each cutout into the intended shelf space folded the excess edges over to cut off

And then went at the thing with aerosol Elmer's like you wouldn't believe.

I like (but don't love) the way it turned out, and it certainly makes use of a dead space in our dining area that was formerly a tangle of cell phone chargers and computer cords.

mood lighting. Ooh la la.

I'm calling it my little home office. Because honestly, it has just about everything I need at arm's reach during a typical weekday, from the boring basics like laptop, pens, and paper to the exciting personalized touches of a mobile baby changing station and some Jillian Michael's-approved hand weights. And a basket filled with current cans of spray paint. Because you honestly can't say when the mood will strike, so it's best to be prepared.

Clearly I missed my calling as a design blogger. Clearly.

A Late Vocation

My IHOD-inspired (don't ask how, it just was) refurbished coat-rack.

When I was a young and single thing, carefree and flush with cash from my lucrative stints in the world of Catholic non-profits, I used to dream about the way I'd decorate my eventual home, and about the many lavish and extravagant purchases I would one day make at AFW.

Fast forward three years and two babies, and while the benjamins have stopped rolling in (in fact, most of them roll out these days, what the ...) my desire to decorate my nest has not abated.

$6 headboard from Saver's, transformed ala spray paint and glaze. Also pictured: small party animal.

In fact, as Dave would be quick to point out, it is actually fairly and neurotically intense. To the point that, 2 days after a move or the night of an arrival home from traveling, I'm frantically unpacking, moving furniture, scrubbing floors and filling bags and bags (and bags and bags) of crap for Goodwill. So that I can, you know, bring home more future bags of crap from Goodwill.

Detail on headboard. You're welcome.

So I've had to figure out a way to channel this latent desire to decorate - to create - in a way that doesn't destroy our meager 'home furnishings' budget. Because let's be honest; there's just not a line item for that one yet. For some saner, holier people, I suspect the answer might be patient, gradual accumulation of nice pieces over the course of several years/decades of marriage. For me, it's the suburban equivalent of dumpster-diving. For my husband, it is a deeply shameful exercise in humility every time I direct him to pull over in his church clothes and 'grab that thing off that person's curb' wearing a sharpie'd 'free' tatted on a piece of cardboard.

roadside freebie turned back porch coffee table. also pictured: the truck we hauled it home in.

Figuring out that #1 I liked to do this kind of thing and #2 I was passably competent with a can of spray paint was nothing short of astonishing. 

Formerly known as ugly-ass some-assembly-required Walmart bachelor piece.

After 13+ years in the public school system, I had successfully managed to avoid a single art class past the 5th grade, so I was fairly certain I was creatively crippled, doomed to spend allllll my hours of leisure time as a SAHM reading trashy novels and emptying the dishwasher. And maybe dusting off the 'ol trumpet for some souza-inspired afternoon tunes, since I was playing in the pep band while my cooler friends were throwing pots in ceramics class. Loser.

I have to admit, even Pinterest, with all its glittering promise and happy 'finished product' images made me a little nervous and not a little insecure. I couldn't replicate anything from the culinary department, I had no desire to learn how to sew (or any machine to feed fabric into), and I was certainly not about to refinish old milkcrates to look like Anthropoligie-inspired shelving for our family library...or was I?

Basically, choosing the least intimidating (in my humble opinion) means of 're-creating' something old and ugly into something new, fun, and, if not perfect, than at least passably attractive, has opened up for me an entire creative world. Instead of pallet boards, I now see potential patio furniture. An abandoned MDF bookshelf from Target looks to me suspiciously like a wine shelf waiting to be redressed. And a can of spraypaint? Liquid gold. Even if it is a more sensibly-hued turquoise or bronzed iron. (Sorry, Glamma.) And you know what? Naptime has never, ever been this fun.

Gotta be honest, one of my most amazing creations yet. Definitely a collaborative effort.