Was it planned?

Worth it's very own repost here, because the lovely Grace says it so much more pithily and lovingly than I could.

3 Truths and a Lie

Can you find the hidden dose of reality in these headlines?

1. 'Safe' sex: a failed experiment, or a failure to communicate effectively to our youth?  The media will never admit how fundamentally flawed and ineffective this archaic policy truly is...

2. Living proof of the triumphant victory of life over death?  Perhaps... or perhaps merely an isolated sub-cultural phenomenon?  Let's let the numbers do the talking...

3. I think I'd rather deliver pizzas ala Dave Ramsey than start selling off parts, no matter how dire the economic straits.

4. I have a good feeling that I'm getting these for Christmas.

One year already?!

Whew.  That was fast!

Sitting here with my little man running (cruising) circles around me as I 'work,' and reflecting on the goodness that has been his first year of life outside the womb.  Joseph Kolbe, I love you more than I thought possible.  Thanks for being here, bud.

And yes, this is his birthday present.  A blog post.  Or a blog paragraph, more like it, with a link to his birth story.  Eh, we did cupcakes last weekend.  Enjoy it kid, you're not an only child anymore...

Weekenders

Coffee: check

Baby delightfully taken by his Daddy's unaccustomed presence during the morning hours: check

Uninterrupted time to sip coffee and peruse the news: check

Life is good.  Hope your weekend treats you accordingly.

Food for thought:

To enrage: just say 'no' to spray tanning.  Especially if you can't spell the word 'no' yet...

To illuminate: the reality of an 'open' liberal mind

To encourage: because we can all use a little good news now and then

Just wondering...

I woke up early (EARLY, Joey.  TOO early!) this morning and as I lay in bed, listening to the gentle noises of my almost toddler caterwauling like a suffering tabby, I allowed my mind to wander over the various and sundry mysteries of my (admittedly) small universe and came up with the following:

How much liquid should my almost-one-year-old be drinking each day?  Does coffee count?  I think he's been drinking my coffee...

Why am I incapable of meal planning?  Why does 5:00 pm come up and slap me in the back of the head everyday and leave me stunned and stupid over the impending reality of dinner and the sorry truth that I have to make it.  Again.  Why can't men live on cereal like we can?

Is there a wittier ripost I might have offered to the Kaiser nurse who heckled  me over the phone whilst scheduling my first prenatal visit for this little bug and WHISTLED at me that I've been 'busy?'   "Heh heh heh.  Somebody's been havin' themselves some unprotected sex!" (I swear I could hear her internal monologue)

Why am I so fat already?  Why do I keep asking my husband if he thinks this is so, when I know well and good that for the sake of all that is holy the man is never, EVER going to answer in the affirmative to this one, even should I gain 2.3 million lbs like last time and start stealing his extra-large Kirkland's Best t-shirts to fashion into 3rd trimester mumus.  Even then, he knows the right answer to THAT question.

Why are boots so expensive when ground beef is so cheap?  Aren't they fashioned from the same creature?  Why the markup?  WHY?!

vs.

Come on.  Seriously?  A 1,700% mark up? That ain't right.

And finally, is it so wrong that after 28 years of searching, I've finally discovered the real motivating factor for exercise, and it turns out it's childcare?

I've calculated it carefully, and it turns out that in an average month I can score a maximum of 60 hours of babysitting courtesy of my local 24 Hour Fitness.  You can bet those girls in the Kid Zone have me on a first name basis.  Irony of ironies that my newfound exercise fanaticism is not going to help me get any smaller any time soon...